But I want someone to have sex with. Not a fuckbuddy or a friend with benefits. I want a real boyfriend. Who cares about me not just physically. I want someone who really cares.

:c

i want someone who will stop when i say no.

But I am finally at peace with myself, I’m not feeling desperate or anything, so I really don’t want to have sex with him. Or do anything sexual. Or anything. I don’t want my emotions to go crazy or something.

So I keep putting him off :/

I keep making up excuses. And a lot of them are true. Like I work a lot and I volunteer and stuff. And honestly the days I’m home I love to chill and relax.

I don’t want more complications in my life.

Plus I kinda like a new guy a little. His name’s Joe and he’s really sweet and nice and funny c: But he has a girlfriend in college and she’s beautiful and they’re in love and blah blah blah. Plus he’s a year younger than me so… (yeah he’s a highschool sophomore dating a college freshman idk)

AND I joke around about sex a lot so I feel like if I dated him he’d expect it like immediately. And I’m just done with sex. I am so sick of it, because I use it just to hurt myself. Honestly next time I have sex I want to be in love with the person. I’m not saying sex without love is bad -each person has their own preferences and you can have as much sex as you want, idc- but I just want emotional and loving sex.

I wonder if I’ll ever get it.

Times like these I miss my ex, Felix. He was a long-distance boyfriend (aka online) but I really did love him. Truth be told, I’m considering visiting California when I graduate high school just to visit him. He’s kind of an ass but he’s the best guy I’ve ever had. I at least want to be friends with him. :|

nonplussedbyreligion:

I usually don’t play Tumblr games, but this is about books, and you know me and my love of books :) 

1. Favorite childhood book? 
2. What are you reading right now? 
3. What books do you have on request at the library? 
4. Bad book habit?
5. What do you currently have checked out at the library?
6. Do you have an e-reader?
7. Do you prefer to read one book at a time, or several at once?
8. Have your reading habits changed since starting a blog?
9. Least favourite book you read this year (so far)?
10. Favorite book you’ve read this year?
11. How often do you read out of your comfort zone?
12. What is your reading comfort zone?
13. Can you read on the bus?
14. Favorite place to read?
15. What is your policy on book lending?
16. Do you ever dog-ear books?
17. Do you ever write in the margins of your books?
18. Not even with text books?
19. What is your favourite language to read in?
20. What makes you love a book?
21. What will inspire you to recommend a book?
22. Favorite genre?
23. Genre you rarely read (but wish you did)?
24. Favourite biography?
25. Have you ever read a self-help book?
26. Favourite cookbook?
27. Most inspirational book you’ve read this year (fiction or non-fiction)?
28. Favorite reading snack?
29. Name a case in which hype ruined your reading experience.
30. How often do you agree with critics about a book?
31. How do you feel about giving bad/negative reviews?
32. If you could read in a foreign language, which language would you chose?
33. Most intimidating book you’ve ever read?
34. Most intimidating book you’re too nervous to begin?
35. Favorite Poet?
36. How many books do you usually have checked out of the library at any given time?
37. How often have you returned books to the library unread?
38. Favorite fictional character? 
39. Favourite fictional villain?
40. Books I’m most likely to bring on vacation?
41. The longest I’ve gone without reading.
42. Name a book that you could/would not finish.
43. What distracts you easily when you’re reading?
44. Favorite film adaptation of a novel?
45. Most disappointing film adaptation?
46. The most money I’ve ever spent in the bookstore at one time?
47. How often do you skim a book before reading it?
48. What would cause you to stop reading a book half-way through?
49. Do you like to keep your books organized?
50. Do you prefer to keep books or give them away once you’ve read them?
51. Are there any books you’ve been avoiding?
52. Name a book that made you angry.
53. A book you didn’t expect to like but did?
54. A book that you expected to like but didn’t?
55. Favorite guilt-free, pleasure reading?

(Source: mssterbrightside)

We hold these wounds to be self-evident, that all teens aren’t created equal, that they are endowed by their parents and peers with certain unquestionable truths, that among these are ugliness, worthlessness, and the impossible pursuit of perfection. — That to secure these truths, bullies are instituted among teens, deriving their cruel powers from the consent of the majority, — That whenever any Form of bullying becomes destructive to these ends, it is the Right of the majority to promote or to participate in it, and to institute new cruelties, laying their foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their low self-esteem and depression. Brashness, indeed, will dictate that bullies long established should not be changed for even the worst causes; and accordingly all experiences such as suicide that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable to right themselves by upholding the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and cruelties, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to urge on such bullies, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these teens; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of coping. The history of the present teenager is a history of repeated injuries and wounds, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these teens. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

Please distract me with your stories.